东宫 Eastern Palace: Heavy Frost Made the Cold Ceramic Roof Tiles Seem Bright (Part 1)

The title of this side story also comes from the poem, Song of Everlasting Regret, which I mentioned before in side story 1.

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There was no lamp lit in the evening, the sky was dark and gloomy. There were dragonflies in the courtyard, flying very low. The Tuberose flowers by the stairs have blossomed, when a dragonfly landed on the stem of the flower, only the leaves were shaking.

There seemed to be a thunderstorm within the heat.

Sitting in the hallway would cause one to sweat quietly.

A'Wu was afraid that I was depressed, so she quietly sat next to me, waving the fan for me.

I couldn't help but think back to the times when I was seven or eight years old, I was still a carefree child, as well as A'Wu, who always sits next to me, waving her fan and watching me learn how to read and write.

The summer days were long. Because I saw the white silk fan in A'Wu's hand, I wrote a poem about the fan on the thin silk fan itself. 

"Made into a fan for joyous trysts, round as the bright moon. In and out of my lord's cherished sleeve, waved back and forth to make a light breeze [1]."

The poem was only written based on the fan, I did not expect that when A'Wu saw it, her expression would change dramatically, she said to me, "Your ladyship cannot write this poem anymore."

I couldn't help, but look at A'Wu.

A'Wu said: "This poem is inauspicious."

I then remembered the remaining second half of that poem: Often I fear the arrival of the autumn season, cool winds overcoming the summer heat. Discarded into a box, affection cut off before fulfillment [1].
 

It was the poem 'A Discarded Fan' by the former Han Dynasty's Ban Jie Yu, who was a famous and talented woman. She was also a well known Consort Xian, however her life did not end well. When she was in favor, she was afraid of being in the same carriage with the Emperor so she would refuse. After falling out of favour, she had lived in seclusion in the Chang Xin Palace with only scrolls that had a few words, which allows people to imagine that there would be such a woman that had lived before, who had written poems.

I actually didn't really care.

Because I am going to be the Empress.

Being the Empress is naturally different from being a consort.

Being an unfavored consort means you would have nothing, so you would worry about the gains and losses. However, the Empress is the wife that will be side by side with the supreme Emperor.

Not just me, my father is also quite expectant.

We are the noble Zhao clan, so of course we are qualified to enter the harem.

When I was thirteen years old, I first met Li Cheng Yin, Prince Jin.

     

Among the many sons of the Emperor, he is the most special one.

His birth mother died young and he was raised in the central palace since childhood, he is the adopted son of the Empress.

My father once privately said: "It's a pity that he is not the Empress's own son, in the end there is still a distance in their relationship."

The Emperor also has some outstanding sons, I know that Prince Jin was not very much loved by the Emperor.

Consort Shu was the birth mother of Prince Jin, a secret legend in the palace. People would quietly talk about her because she was once only one step away from the position of Empress. There was no children in the Central Palace, Consort Shu was a wise person, people who have seen her before would praise her for being smart. She was able to guess the Emperor’s thoughts every time. It was rumored that the Emperor had once sent her a blank piece of paper, on which she calmly drew or wrote on the original paper, sealed it and then handed over to the envoy to send back, all of which satisfied the Emperor.

At that time, she was like a bright moon, shining brightly within the harem. Although not as bright as the sun, but when the moon was in the sky, the stars were dim in comparison. 

If she had a few more years, she would have definitely taken the position of Empress instead.
 

But she died.
 

In the harem, smart people don't always live long.
 

Especially very ambitious smart people.
 

Therefore, sometimes hiding a weakness is also a kind of real intelligence.
 

Prince Jin is this type of smart person.
 

He was not brilliant, nor did the Emperor have high expectations of him. Being stuck between his brothers, he was not outstanding.
 

But I know that he is really a smart person.
 

When my father was still hesitating between Prince Jin and Prince Zhu, I said I want to marry Prince Jin.
 

My father asked me: "Have you thought it through?"

I nodded. 

Actually my father didn't know that I had met Prince Jin once.
 

Not deliberately, but my brother and I went out to watch willow shooting [2], they said that it was Prince Jin, so I immediately looked back while on my horse.
 

He also rode his horse, while grasping onto his bow. He was smiling and talking to person beside him. 

I recognized the person next to him, it was the young master of the Pei family.
 

Pei Zhao has always been known as a jade-like person, because he was born with elegant and refined looks that excel others. There were some of his achievements listed in the chamber.

Unexpectedly, they treated each other equally as if they were the same status. The two walked side by side, like two newly made lotus arrows in the summer, reflecting each other. Suddenly, it occurred to me that if his Majesty was born with such a handsome appearance, and Consort Shu was a famous beauty, it was natural that Prince Jin would be this handsome. 

The drums had sounded again, it was Prince Jin's turn to shoot the willow. I couldn't help but stop my horse and deliberately take a look at his attempt to shoot.

Prince Jin rode his horse while holding onto his bow, as if accidentally, he shot an arrow.
 

That arrow was not extremely exceptional, but it was impartial, it hit the gourd tied to the willow branch, the gourd fell down to the ground, and the little siskin [3] inside the gourd flew into the sky, countless people applauded. Prince Jin covered his forehead with his hand, raised his head to looked at the siskin that was flying higher and higher. The sunlight reflected on his cheeks, there were sweat droplets on his face that was as clear and sparkling as dew droplets on a jade plate.

I watched him look into the sky, but for some reason I felt that he was very far away from me, like an unattainable dream. He was definitely just a few feet away from me. I refused to accept this, because ever since I was young, there was nothing that was unattainable.

I don’t know why I was bothered by this thought, maybe it was because the sun was scorching that day, but the pride in the young man's eyes, it was as if it was inadvertently hidden in his expression. I still remember that day he wore a brown non-Han clothing. The gold thread on the collar was shining brightly under the sunlight, his whole person seemed to be shining brightly.

 

I thought, it must be him.

The historians have described Emperor Taizong as someone that was talented with the appearance of the dragon and phoenix.

I couldn't figure out what that was like until I saw Prince Jin. 

I was determined to marry him.

My father hesitated a bit, I calmly said that if Prince Jin was the Crown Prince, then I would be the Crown Princess.

I know that my family was still hesitant, but fortunately on the bright side, because he is the adopted son raised in the central palace, he is the closest one to the position of Crown Prince.

All I need is for my family to help push him to that position when the opportunity comes. 

My father was still hesitating. As a result Prince Jin was smarter than I thought, without waiting for my family to help him, he calmly sat in the position of Crown Prince.

Of course it was because Prince Wei had made a big mistake.

Prince Wei was just too impatient, the Emperor was still alive, but Prince Wei impatiently stretched out his hand, and even attempted to entrap his own brother, how could the Emperor tolerate him?

The brothers competed against each other for the position, but it was Prince Jin who easily won and became the biggest winner.

For a moment, everyone in court was shocked.

I secretly admired my own foresight. I knew that my father had expressed goodwill to Prince Jin several times. Prince Jin, actually no, now the Crown Prince, he also was quite interested in marrying the Zhao family's daughter.

I didn't expect that the Empress would be the one who complicated the situation.

She was probably very reluctant to see me become the Crown Princess, but she secretly instructed the ministers to persuade the Emperor to allow the Crown Prince to pacify the Western Regions, and then she planned out the political marriage.

I really could not calm down, I privately sent someone to inform the Crown Prince that I will meet up with him.

I knew that the Crown Prince would come, sure enough, he came on time.

In fact, this was the first time that we have really met each other. In order not to be seen by others, I was wearing a veiled hat that covered my face. I saw him standing near the jade railing in front of the courtyard well, smiling at me.

He smiled very beautifully, as if the sun that day was reflected on his face, his face that was like white jade, clear and bright.

I couldn't think of anything to say to him, the apricot blossom tree near the corner of the courtyard had grew very well, there was a siskin on one of the tree branches, pecking at the flower petals, the golden bell used to protect the tree that was blown by the wind had sounded. The siskin flew up, circled around and landed, still pecking flower petals.

I suddenly thought of that day of the willow shooting, that siskin, I don't know where it flew, could it be the one in front of me?

I swear I had the courage, and I had thought of a lot of things to say to him before the meeting, so I don’t know why when I got to meet him in person, I suddenly felt that there was no need to say anything.

Sure enough, he understood what I was thinking.

He snapped the tree branch and then gave me an apricot blossom, said, "Please rest assured."

I took the branch of apricot blossom, elegant and fragrant, that flower also symbolizes luck. I finally said: "I only hope that your Highness succeed, and return shortly after.”

 

I embroidered a pair of armguards for him. I have put a bit of effort into my embroidery skills, within the chambers I have some reputation in embroidery. After all, the Empress must officiate the silkworm ceremony [4].

 

On the side of the armguards is embroidered with my name, which is Se Se these two words.

The Crown Prince was an elegant and understanding man, because the next day, he ordered someone to send me a bunch of beads. These beads were jade colour and transparent, very beautiful. I ordered someone to make a bead necklace, even my father who was accustomed to seeing expensive items would be quite shocked. After all, these beads were more expensive and luxurious than pearls, a treasure from a distant foreign country.

 

This move of the Crown Prince, he must have regarded me as someone that's as precious as pearls, my father was very satisfied.

Some people in the court deliberately made things difficult for the Crown Prince by asking him to lead the Yu Lin army to the Western Regions. These Yu Lin soldiers are from noble families in the Capital, they can fight no matter where they go. Without wrinkling his brows, he took Pei Zhao with him and led the Yu Lin army to the West.

I was in the Capital, only waiting for his news. 

The Western Regions was very far away, thousands of miles away, it will take a few months to get there. His expedition to the Western Regions, although I was worried, but I could only look into the distance at the wild geese in the sky.

People in ancient times would tie a letter onto the goose's feet and send it flying into the long distance.
 

But I cannot write to him.
 

I don't know if he was safe, and if he had pacified the Western Regions. 

Until Pei Zhao had sent someone back to the Capital.

Only then did I knew that something had happened to him in the Western Regions, he stumbled and fell from the cliff, whether he was alive or dead was unknown.

What was surprising was that I wasn't panicking. The person I like, his fate was determined by the heavens, I would not believe that he would be this unlucky.

Besides, he was with the army, how could he stumble and fall from the cliff, I didn't believe the vague words of Pei Zhao's letter. I know that there must be someone that planned on taking the Crown Prince's life.

But he has grown up safely in the deep palace, I don't believe someone had planned this. 

Sure enough, his Highness has safely returned.

However, he also brought back a woman who was said to be the Princess of Western Liang.

The court officials have their own thoughts, but the Crown Prince was a huge contributor to the suppression of the Western Regions. The officials had tried to persuade the Emperor not to bestow the title of Crown Princess to that foreign woman, someone had also came up with an idea of marrying off the Princess of Western Liang to Prince Nan. I know that my father was also thinking of something too, no one wants the position of Crown Princess to fall on the head of a foreign woman.

I am only afraid that this situation was hard to resolve, because the Emperor was unpredictable, sure enough, his Majesty quickly issued an edict for the Princess of Western Liang to be married to the Crown Prince and become the Crown Princess.

My father was very disappointed, he asked me: "Daughter, do you still want to marry the Crown Prince?"
 

I know that as long as I say one word, someone will naturally get rid of the Western Liang Princess for me. Right now she lives in the inn, where it is sparsely populated. She can’t even speak the Central Plains language, with only one servant from Western Liang by her side, who can't speak. No matter what method is used, it would be easy to make the Western Liang Princess die silently before the wedding.

I hesitated not because I pitied the Princess of Western Liang's life, but I am worried that the Emperor would feel that our Zhao family's hand were stretched too long.

The Emperor would not tolerate Prince Wei, so he would definitely not tolerate a minister who played tricks in front of him.

I persuaded my father to forget about it. As for whether or not I will marry the Crown Prince, I decided to see him and then decide. 

A year have passed, the Crown Prince seemed to have changed a lot, but it also seemed that nothing has changed. It was just that he became pale and thin. It was said that he was once seriously injured in the Western Regions, his life was almost hanging on a thread. But now, he has recovered, although he still was a bit tired.

I could faintly feel that there seems to be a further distance between us. I can't explain it, it's just a woman's intuition. Although he still treats me kindly, but I would feel that his eyes does not have me. His eyes always seemed to look pass me, looking at another place.

He still gave me a bunch of beads.

I smiled and said, "You have already given me before."

He said: "I will give these for you to string it into a rabbit to play with."

I didn't know that beads could be strung into a rabbit. Suddenly he became interested and ordered someone to bring the needles and threads, and showed me how to make it. 

The Crown Prince suddenly became serious when doing this kind of children game. The beaded rabbit seemed very realistic, using black Agate beads for the eyes made it seemed very lifelike.
 

He knotted the knot and showed me the little clear green rabbit in his hand. He smiled and said: "Look, it's done."
 

I have never heard him speak so softly, as if he had become another person. I suddenly felt happy. At this moment, he was no longer unapproachable and distant, but kind and approachable, especially his eyes, looking at me in a pulsed manner. He said, "Is it fun? I'll give you a live rabbit tomorrow, then you can compare and see if they are similar to each other."

I placed the beaded rabbit in front of the necklace, the candlelight flickered during the night, which made the bead necklace and rabbit very green. I leaned on the seat and looked at the beaded rabbit, the candlelight reflected it into a small round shadow, like a small mouse. The candlelight flickered, the shadow of it became longer, the shadows of the rabbit ears were even longer. Now the shadow looks like a rabbit and not a mouse. I thought of the way Li Cheng Yin lowered his head to string these beads, so serious and careful, every bead he string it carefully, I don't know why I suddenly felt a tenderness in my heart. In the end, I decided to marry Li Cheng Yin.

Even if I could only be a Liang Di [5], I know that the Crown Princess was only an empty title.

Sure enough, she was just a Crown Princess by title.

The Crown Prince disliked that Western Liang woman very much, never looked at her in the eye.

Instead I would persuade the Crown Prince from time to time. On the surface, I was able to tolerate it, but actually I was barely able to tolerate it.

Notes:

[1] The translation of the poem was found through this site: academia.edu by Patricia B. Welsh. If anyone wants to read the full poem and learn more about it, you can go to that website.

[2]射柳 Willow Shooting - Gourds would be hung on the willow tree. Inside each gourd, there would be a siskin, once the gourd is shot with an arrow, it will open and the siskin inside would fly out. Whoever shot the gourd with the siskin that flew the highest wins the competition.

[3]黄雀 siskin - a yellow finch

[4]亲祭蚕桑 Silkworm Ceremony - This ceremony is officiated by the Empress. The purpose of this ceremony was to encourage silkworm farming and silk production as silk generates most of the country's wealth and is considered a valuable product. The ceremony will only start after the silkworm is born. The Empress would fast two days before the ceremony. The process of the ceremony includes the Empress picking mulberry leaves and feeding the silkworm. After the silkworm cocoons are formed, the best silkworm cocoon would be chosen and presented to the Empress. On another auspicious day, the Empress and the workers would go to the weaving room for silk reeling and to dye the silk into different colours for embroidering sacrificial clothing.

[5]良娣 Liang Di - A consort of the Crown Prince, second highest in rank out of the wives of the Crown Prince.

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